You may work diligently to try and stop critical self-talk. Nonetheless, doing so requires focus and struggle; stopping a behavior is harder than replacing it. Once you concentrate on using self-talk as a tool, undesirable self-criticism will naturally fade.
For instance, perhaps your inner voice tells you that you aren’t good enough to work toward a desirable dream. Rather than trying to stop the voice, enlist its help, making it work in an instructional how to manner. Regularly ask yourself what the next step is to get what you want and give your voice a job. If negative talk is ingrained, don’t reject it, let it flow and turn it into what if sentences. Inwardly ask what step you would take next if you were good enough, bright enough, or wise enough to get what you wanted. Using what if talk opens your mind and gives your imagination permission to produce ideas. At the same time, it expands the possibilities before you instead of reducing options.
No doubt, you’ve come across the notion that you must always use positive self-talk such as affirmations. Affirmations are wonderful, but only work if they are believable. If your psyche rejects them because what they suggest is seen as impossible, they don’t work. Instructive self-talk, on the other hand, always has the power to be helpful. You just need to pick a goal, even a small one, and use inner-talk to encourage and inspire you to move steadily in its direction.
Additionally, be aware that your inner voice isn’t you as a whole person, it’s simply the product of your beliefs. What it says is only as viable as your opinions. If your opinions about yourself are based on poor self-esteem not facts, your voice will be negative until you address this issue and build confidence. Although what the voice says isn’t true, it reflects an inner truth about how you feel about yourself. Begin seeing it as the reflection it is, rather than factual, and it will have a useful purpose without needing to be changed or written over. Use it to understand where you are regarding development.
How you use self-talk and the way you see it makes a huge difference to whether it is helpful or destructive. Know that your inner voice is an asset rather than a hindrance and let it come to your aid instead of damaging your self-esteem.