“Get real,” you might say. “Some events in life are terrible or painful, no matter what.” Indeed, if someone you love dies or you go through a catastrophe, you won’t jump for joy, and there will be pain; to think otherwise is naive.
However, you meet less challenging situations each day and may decide how to deal with them. Simple difficulties can become mountainous in your mind if you dwell on them. Deepen them with negative thoughts, adding weight, and they become a burden. Many small challenges, met unfavorably, result in pressure and strain.
Choose your experience wisely
Everyone would pick the best ways to manage events, happily steering their experience of life, if only they were aware. To manage your emotional journey, you need to stay awake, noticing the choices before you. With your eyes closed, you forget to focus on what’s uplifting about what’s happening and concentrate on what makes you unhappy. Stay alert, remembering to seek elements to elevate your spirits, and you create joy.
Focus on positive energy
Warmth, comfort, contentedness, joy, bliss, balance, harmony, clarity; these are qualities you might aim to reach depending on the severity of events. If a situation seems dire, you may make balance, comfort, and clarity your targets. If you face a small challenge, perhaps you’ll reach for joy. In any case, the idea is to grasp a lighter state of being, so your experience is manageable and constructive.
The way you steer your emotions is to set your attention on aspects of events that feel good. How much positivity you recognize reflects your mental state. At first, there may not seem to be anything positive to work with, but as you gradually open your awareness and your mood shifts, you’ll notice more qualities in your favor.
On occasions when you find nothing positive to consider, start by acknowledging your feelings rather than pushing them away. Although this exercise is meant to help you gain positivity, this doesn’t mean any reaction is wrong. Even negative emotions have their purposes. Think of them as steps; some are low, at the bottom of the staircase. Those higher up are positive, and you want to reach them because they feel good.
Sometimes, you have to start from the bottom and gently move upward. As your emotions shift, step-by-step, you have access to more comfortable feelings. You can’t leap from the lowest step to the highest just like that; you travel at a speed relevant to your situation and personality.
You can choose your experience, not by manipulating what happens in your environment; these things aren’t often within your control. Widening your outlook, changing your perspective in steps, takes you to more enjoyable emotions.